


Antipathy

by Imalwaysdown



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Advice, Best Friends, Dream just sets high standards for himself, Exhaustion, Includes roadtrip, Overworking, Self-Doubt, Self-Hatred, Subtle dreamnotfound, burning out, hyper fixations, supportive friends, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-14 21:07:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29548380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Imalwaysdown/pseuds/Imalwaysdown
Summary: Dream is picky about everything he does and he thinks everyone else is too.
Relationships: Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF)
Kudos: 97





	Antipathy

**Author's Note:**

> Hi this is something I wrote up realy quick! Just me venting lol.

Dream doesn't know why he does it, why he puts himself up to such high standards. Why he ponders why he can't complete something when the task was too much. 

And he hates himself for it every time. He hates that he takes so long to perfect something, to make sure there would be no way someone could place their criticism upon it.

It happens sometimes when he's doing streams, videos, ideas for new things, but what he hates most is that he has no motivation to commit to some things. 

It's happening now, when he's writing. He re-reads something, changes it, hates the way it looks, and then it's all gone in a matter of seconds by copy and cutting it. It repeats. 

It happens another time when he makes plans with Sapnap, utterly forgetting what they had begun and not even getting ready in time due to his mind being full of everything else. Sapnap doesn't mind, but Dream feels like he ruined everything. 

They're streaming this time when it gets worse. 

Dream can barely manage to keep his eyes open, George's voice only playing another role in it. He hadn't eaten much that day, his sleep schedule had been messed up, and he had a few headaches to go along with it.

There is no way he isn't going to keep streaming, seeing as this was his only stream in a long time. He isn't even speed-running like how he was at the beginning of the stream. 

Unfocus and exhaustion are taking a toll on him during it, even if he is just talking to the chat and his best friend. 

He can't help but to want to stop, but his mind tells him that the fans would hate him for it. They'd already been waiting so long, they deserve a few hours of him streaming.

It's not long before George leaves and Dream longs for his presence still. George always seems to be a good peacemaker for Dream's whirlwinds, but Dream would never tell him that. 

"You seem tired," He wants someone to ask, voice showing their full concern and care for him, but it doesn't seem to happen. No one seems to care that he's starting to piece apart just because he's a little burnt out. 

He knows his friends care, but sometimes they aren't aware of the things he feels. He's good at hiding most things, so he didn't blame them.

He soon finds he's good at hiding things through his feelings for his best friend. It only makes him more tired, focusing on his straight friend—might he add— more than he should. It overtakes almost anything else. 

Music helps a little, he finds. There are a few select songs he plays when trying to get his mind straight. But then it becomes boring, he blames it on the fact he likes new things to help his mind feel less uninteresting. He still goes back to listen to the songs to provide him comfort, but he can't find a reason to listen to music as often as he used to. 

He tries to write some himself. It's to get his thoughts out, to pull everything out and put it on paper so maybe that it would just stick and go away for once.

He loves it. He actually loves something he creates after a few weeks of spiraling self-hatred. It isn't that he has never been proud of something in too long, or that he hasn't bragged about how good he is at something, but it's refreshing after what he has felt like for a while now. He doesn't hate or or find himself picking at it.

But he does feel scared that others will. He hates that they will think the song would be bad because they've never seen anything from him before. He's terrified that they'll laugh and it will become a meme and he will have to play it off saying he made it as a joke.

It's even worse than before, he even panics about it.

George helps him. He talks to him because he needs him.

"I'm sorry, Dream," George starts, "I know they think that now, but watch. They'll love it once they realize you're being serious. You need to tell them you're being serious."

"I know," Dream sighs, tugging at his own hair, "but I feel like they'll be picky."

"Dream they think your music taste is the best," George let's put a breathy laugh, one that Dream finds comfort in. Dream almost forgets he's nervous, "if you did anything similar they'll think it's great. They'll think anything you do is great. If it helps, I think anything you do is great."

Dreams heart flutters, but he focuses on what George says. It isn't like he didn't think some fans wouldn't hate it, but hearing it coming from someone else's mouth, whose opinion he holds so high, it's a huge refreshment.

"You might be getting at something there," Dream says, even if he still feels a little bit of the opposite, "I'm posting it...right...now."

He watched as it's posted from his private page, lingering on the sight of it as he waits for feedback to come in.

"Now we wait," George says, "play it dream. You've been making me wait forever to listen."

Dream shakes as he nervously hits play, he lets it play as George listens to it. His heart pounds and his hands get sweaty when George doesn't utter a word about the song.

But then it ends, and George just giggles and says, "Dream! That was so good! What did you mean when you said you didn't think we'd like it? You actually did amazing."

George rarely compliments him for so long, so Dream takes it all in and says, "tha-thank you."

Dream cries when he sees his friends and fans being so supportive about the song. His heart feels warm and all the thoughts are gone about them being picky.


End file.
